Thursday, April 24, 2008

22 Weeks and Counting

B-rad took this photo of my Buddha Belly yesterday. Hard to imagine that there are 18 more weeks ahead of me.

5 Months Ago...

This is the little blue Plus Sign that started it all.... December 22nd, 2007. My Eggo is Preggo...

B-rad is most awesome. When i was in the Doctor's office confirming the pregnancy, he went to the flower shop and got me these!! He told the florist that his wife just found out she was pregnant and he had this great idea and wondered if she could help him out. It's kinda hard to tell in this photo, but there are two open flowers and one bud, but the important thing is that they're all on one stem.

The most perfect flowers of all time.

Our Valentine's Day this year was spent getting an ultrasound! Seeing our baby squirming around for the first time - it was so awesome to see it moving and actually doing stuff, cuz at that point i still hadn't felt it move yet.

I am happy. This is our baby. Meet Chewie!

Wednesday, April 23, 2008

An online conversation

jess says:
big as a house yet?

Laura is Made of and Powered by Baby Heartbeats says: funny you should ask, i just blogged about that.
as big as my house.
i hardly fit
i'll have to start camping outside. lol

jess says:
got a few more months left tho, right? August or so?

Laura says:
Yup, end of august.
it's pretty cool, actually. Chewie (that's the nickname) is very active and moves around a lot, and kicks and stuff.

jess says:
that's an awesome nickname.... that must be pretty exciting

Laura says:
and i often trip out when i think thoughts like: "Isn't it WEIRD that there's a HUMAN BEING GROWING INSIDE ME????"
like, serioulsy, mammals are weird.

jess says:
"Powered by Baby Heartbeats" kinda nailed that idea home for me.... got me thinkin how strange it must be.......

Laura says:
it's totally awesome and totally weird and bizarre at the same time.
like, i go through 27 years of my life thinking that my body is my own, and now:
i eat when the baby tells me too, i pee when the baby tells me too, i sleep when the baby tells me too, if the baby doesn't like the loud music it kicks till i turn it off.
i'm a robot.

jess says:
I never ever thought of it that way.......
I always thought of it as the other way around........
(but whaddo I know? really.... just a guy... )

Laura says:
and the heart beat? totally awesome. it's like, super fast, sounds like a tiny galloping horse.

jess says:
pretty amazing really...

Laura says:
well, currently, i eat like 7 meals a day.

jess says:

Laura says:
why? cuz the baby eats MY food, so i have to keep replenishing the supply

jess says:
yep... doin a lot of growin in there!

Laura says:
lol yeah, tell me about it.
and everyone keeps saying: "You still have four months to go!!"
and the most crazy trippy/mind fuck thing about all of it is.... The only way this baby is coming out, is the way it went in!

i am a goddess

Last night i came to the conclusion that it's time to remove words like "Big" "Fat" and "Chubby" from my vocabulary when discussing my growing belly. And to adopt and embrace words like: "Curvy" "Round" and "Buddha" instead.

i realized that this stage is where i'd imagined myself to be for years, with a nice glowing baby belly jutting out in front of me, and i'd imagined myself showing it off and being proud of it.

this was not the case.

I'm aware that i've never been a size 3 model - nor will i ever be. Having dealt with body issues my whole life (like every other woman in the world) i kept looking in the mirror and seeing - not someone who is one with the Creator, but a woman who just won't stop growing bigger everyday. Everything is bigger. And instead of adoring this bulge i've been just a little shy of ashamed. Ashamed is really a strong word, but i can't think of a better one right now.

It's not that i don't love my belly and it's contents, but seeing that distorted self image in the mirror every day was beginning to wear me down.

B-rad has been fabulous. and last night he made me feel like i was beautiful, special, sacred.
i'm trying to keep this frame of mind - to remember that i'll only have a few short months of my life where i can be this close to being a Goddess - to really embrace that and accept it, and love my belly, and be proud of the added curves it's given my body. I am at my most womanly. Every part of my body is the vehicle to bring Chewie into my home and heart and world!!

i'm beginning to find peace with my body.
that's a beautiful thing.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

i like giraffes.

i spent most of my day off painting a giraffe for Chewie's room. i don't know why, but i'm totally addicted to giraffes right now. Sooo cute.

go on over and check it out.

here's a teaser:

But it doesn't just end there.
I bought Chewie a stuffed giraffe to snuggle with (the giraffe that started it all), and now with a giraffe on the wall, there's also a giraffe rattle from my friend Madge, and a pair of giraffe jammies, and a little shirt with giraffes on it.

that's also a shot of our new crib. my sis-in-law Melsie gave us her old crib. B-rad and i were going to repaint it, but i decided last minute that i wanted a new one. My mom is very excited that she may get to keep the old one at her house. She's so cute. When she was over last saturday, we showed her and my dad the nursery, and she picked up the little jammies and cradled them like a baby and got all gushy and adorable.

aw. mom.

also, i'd like to take this opportunity to launch my babyblog... yes, another blog by yours truly. it's just a test run for now. but i wanted to be able to keep everything baby related in one nice little package. So, if your into that kind of thing, check it out... - let me know what you think, if it's rubbish, if it's awesome, if i should forget about it and mishmash it all into the divablog. give me your input, cuz afterall, it's all for you.

love laura

Monday, April 14, 2008

big fat belly update

Originally posted here at

The factory is large.
It's true.
Here's one thing i am sick of hearing:
"You're sooo big!! and you still have 4 more months to go!! HA HA HA"
and also,
"Are you SURE you're not having twins?"
i'm sure.
and i'm aware i'm as big as a house. thanks for bringing to my attention that not only am i hippo, but that i will soon be an elephant.
thank you.

look, it's not my fault! i have a short torso! The baby has nowhere to go, but out!!

I've been in discussions, this past week or so, with a midwife here in town. B-rad and i have been seriously contemplating a home delivery. In a perfect world i'd love to have a water birth, B-rad keeps saying "a water birth in the oceans with the dolphins " - but we don't live anywhere near an ocean, OR dolphins.
The more we talk about it, the less appealing the idea of a hospital birth is....birthing in a busy room with doctors and nurses coming and going, sterile lights and sounds, bitchy maternity ward nurses...

The idea of being in my own home with my own people, and midwife, and familiars sights sounds and smells is far more appealing.

Of course, a home delivery would only be feasible if there are no forseeable complications. So far, there hasn't been. it's all very up in the air right now, and we still have some time.

and yes, a home birth means no epidural. i'm aware. but, i mean, my mom did it four times without one, B-rad's mom did it four times without one, women have been doing it for thousands of years without them.... yes, it will hurt. it will suck. but i'll survive. besides, i'm not so sure i'd want one in a hospital anyway - especially not a learning hospital. Some studies done have indicated that epidurals may lead to complications with breastfeeding. Also, i have a lower back tattoo - and it's still medically undecided whether or not its safe to give an epidural through the ink.

okay. enough pregnancy talk.
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